Updates and Last Week's D'var

Well, I missed a few weeks, and than wrote one for last week, but didn't post it. I'll throw it in at the bottom of this post. For now, I won't be posting normal weekly d'vars here anymore, and will instead be posting them at New Voices. From here on out, I'm going to be using this blog as a place for me to write on a wide range of religious and philosophical topics, sort of as a place for me to get my thoughts out. I will be posting each week with a link to my d'var, so if you can find them here still.

Link to this week's d'var on Vayishlach

Last week's d'var:

Parshat Vayetzev: A Taste of his Own Medicine

Forefathers are often glorified. George Washington was a man of the strongest integrity, Ben Franklin a man of great intelligence, and Thomas Jefferson... well maybe Jefferson's reputation isn't perfect. Judaism does the same with its own forefathers; Avraham, Yitzchak and Yacov. Since Rosh Hashanah, I have been attending Torah studies at a rather frum place. Over the last few weeks I have begun to notice that of the three, Yacov seems to be the most cherished. Yacov could do no wrong, he spent all day everyday studying the Shulchan Aruch in his Yeshiva, he saved the family birthright from evil murderous brother, and he had a very close relationship with Hashem. I found this fascinating, as they have taken what looks like a very flawed person, and instead have reread the text to show Yacov as a holy man. Sadly, I don't buy it. In my eyes, what makes Yacov such a compelling and important figure is that he was flawed, that he struggled at the beginnings of his story with both righteous behavior and his own relationship with Hashem and humanity.

In last weeks parsha, we see the evidence against Yacov in his treatment of his brother. Yacov withholds food from his brother who claims to be dying in order to receive the birthright of the firstborn, and later tricks his father into giving him Esav’s blessing. Yacov’s behavior is deceitful and evidence of a self-centered greedy person. By the end of Parshat Toledot, Yacov is fleeing from his understandably incensed brother, and we can’t particularly feel sympathy for him.

In Vayetzev, we see that Yacov is turning around. According to Rashi, Yacov accidentally passes the holy site where his grandfather had almost sacrificed his father. He turns around, after passing it so that he may go back and pray there. This shows the conflicting nature Yacov, a man that wants to do right and develop his relationship with Hashem, yet his spirituality has not grown to a point where he can be aware of Hashem at all times. As the story continues, Yacov ends up becoming in engaged in labor for his uncle Lavan with the hope of marrying Lavan’s beautiful daughter Rahel. After twenty years, Yacov has acquired both daughters of Lavan as wives and a large amount of his flock. His first wife Leah’s story is sad, as she is obviously the less preferred of the sisters. The text even states that she is hated (29.31). This further shows Yacov’s imperfection, as it is apparent that he favors the more attractive of his wives over the one that could have been considered spiritually pure.

Lavan, Yacov’s employer, uncle and father-in-law, is an excellent fit for the story of Yacov’s growth. Lavan is the epitome of deceit and theft. He first agrees to wed Rahel to Yacov in exchange for seven years of work, but he then changes her out for her sister forcing Yacov to work another seven years. After those first fourteen years of near slave labor in order to finally have the wife he desired, Yacov agrees to work for Lavan further in order to receive a portion of his flock. The two make an agreement that at the end of his service, Yacov can have all the goats with specific markings. Lavan attempts to steal Yacov’s fair wages through isolating the male goats with markings so that they would not breed, Yacov, becoming aware of just how shaky his place with Lavan is, decides to pack up his wives and children and leave.

I believe that it is here that we see Yacov’s turn around. Lavan chases him down and searches all his possessions for stolen goods finding nothing. I believe that the Yacov of earlier would not have left Lavan empty handed. Perhaps, considering all his labor, it would have been considered understandable if he did take a little extra. Instead, we see the first real evidence of Yacov doing the right thing and showing Lavan that he had taken nothing. What was it that caused Yacov to turn around? It was Lavan himself. Working for Lavan for twenty years, Yacov sees his own future. Both Lavan and Yacov are portrayed as cunning men, using their intelligence to trick their own kin even. How different was Yacov from Lavan already? Yacov wanted to be a better man, we see that when he turns back to pray and rest in a holy site. So how must it have felt when he realized that the man that had mistreated him was only an older version of himself? No wonder he fled!

We learn from this something very important. Yacov is imperfect, yet he is the final foundation for the future nation of Yisrael, a nation named after him even. Each of us are flawed, and none of us can do perfectly, but each of us can become something so much greater than what we are today. Yacov is unable to control himself, to better himself as long as he is unaware of what it is that is holding him back. It is only when he sees Lavan, sees himself in his uncle, that he becomes aware of just how wrong he has been and is able to change his behaviors. This has validity for all of our lives. How often is it that we wish to make ourselves better, yet make no improvements until something kicks us in the behind. Praying at a holy place is a good step, but it wasn’t enough. Going to the gym or studying for class are good steps, but they aren’t enough. Yacov had to learn that the issue was an internal flaw before he could turn himself around. If we want to better our own lives we too must take a moment of introspection and be honest with ourselves in order to see what is truly holding us back. We have so much potential, we just need to unlock it.